first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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