I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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