I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
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