Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Randomize
