its not stalking. its research.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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