i will never coherently bang her
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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