They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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