Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(781): View more from Massachusetts

they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.

Fav 4 1602 665
share tweet
(614): View more from Ohio

You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.

Fav 36 1271 3382
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(540): View more from Virginia

This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.

Fav 16 862 2943
share tweet
(509): View more from Washington

I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...

Fav 63 1015 4377
share tweet
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(309): View more from Illinois

they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.

Fav 5 4352 1726
share tweet
(205): View more from Alabama

I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.

(1-205): View more from Alabama

Is it working?

Fav 17 4448 1362
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(612): View more from Minnesota

i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.

Fav 17 3842 1288
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(914): View more from New York

Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?

Fav 0 997 872
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(973): View more from New Jersey

So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.

Fav 1 742 286
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT