Texts From Last Night

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  (210): View more from Texas

  Hey it's Austin.

  (254): View more from Texas

  I am not drunk enough for this conversation.

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  (210): Hey it's Austin. (254): I am not drunk enough for this conversation. http://tfl.nu/124v
  Replies (29) Good night (1157) Bad night (2124)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night

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  (330): I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night http://tfl.nu/n6om
  Replies (28) Good night (1289) Bad night (4874)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.

  (1-519): View more from Ontario

  like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.

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  (519): oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo. (1-519): like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family. http://tfl.nu/xf88
  Replies (17) Good night (6476) Bad night (869)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.

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  (203): if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize. http://tfl.nu/tmed
  Replies (27) Good night (6456) Bad night (1324)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.

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  (630): last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone. http://tfl.nu/hjip
  Replies (21) Good night (8452) Bad night (986)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.

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  (814): I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up. http://tfl.nu/mktj
  Replies (19) Good night (6072) Bad night (2299)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times

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  (978): Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times http://tfl.nu/be2v
  Replies (14) Good night (1697) Bad night (4495)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out

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  (408): his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out http://tfl.nu/n59r
  Replies (10) Good night (993) Bad night (4230)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts

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  (858): Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts http://tfl.nu/npv2
  Replies (17) Good night (6815) Bad night (999)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.

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  (715): I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs. http://tfl.nu/tciw
  Replies (3) Good night (2022) Bad night (753)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show

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  (480): You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show http://tfl.nu/lsuc
  Replies (5) Good night (2666) Bad night (698)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.

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  (858): I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back. http://tfl.nu/eq49
  Replies (3) Good night (682) Bad night (807)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.

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  (727): OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP. http://tfl.nu/c6a1
  Replies (6) Good night (360) Bad night (727)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times

  (1-315): View more from New York

  NAh son

  (1-315): View more from New York

  Just general bites

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  (315): You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times (1-315): NAh son (1-315): Just general bites http://tfl.nu/mt70
  Replies (2) Good night (451) Bad night (315)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.

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  (248): There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now. http://tfl.nu/xeuz
  Replies (2) Good night (290) Bad night (512)

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