We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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