Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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