just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
And then he peed in my hair
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