i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
