I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
