I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
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