What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
