More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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