Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize