Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
