Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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