he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
