I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize