We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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