Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
