I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
These Are 23 Of The Most Uncomfortable Questions You Can Ask
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
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how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.