There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
So much Jack, so little girl.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
