i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
