I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Randomize
