I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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