Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
