Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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