i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
