Church boner. Awkwardddd
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
