dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize