remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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