This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
dude. I can hear the air.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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