can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
