its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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