Are we in a gay sports bar?
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Randomize
