2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize