oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I think my moral compass just broke
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
