Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(214): View more from Texas

I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

I just snuked. Sneezed and puked

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(407): View more from Florida

When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.

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19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
Read it at the TFLN blog
(270): View more from Kentucky

Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.

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(801): View more from Utah

Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.

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(519): View more from Ontario

You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything

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(208): View more from Idaho

He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.

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