Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Small penises have feelings too.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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