if i can run in heels then i can drive
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
