It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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