brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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