she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
is that a dick in a sweater?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
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