she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
