Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Boobs speak an international language.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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