so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize