would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Randomize
