Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Randomize