Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so let's talk penis.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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