So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Randomize
