My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize